getthehorns: (omg!)
HOW'S MY DRIVING?
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01 | application - includes contact info
02 | pokémon and trainer info - updated semi-regularly
getthehorns: (|| Roller)
[ Today's feed is brought to you once again by QuagsireCamTM, as Tagalong grins and waves and the camera before turning it around. We see the interior of the Olivine Gym, where Cliffjuper is standing next to a pokémon that may or may not look familiar to some of you. Ah yes, it's Roller the Darmanitan, looking a bit determined- if one can tell the difference between "determined" and his usual frightening expression.

Jasmine, who is very used to seeing fire types in her Gym, raises her eyebrows at the Darmanitan- it's not a pokémon she sees often. Cliff gives Roller a pat on the shoulder. The pokémon snorts and sets himself. When Jasmine releases her Skarmory, the battle is on!

The Skarmory circles Roller, deceptively fast, and trying hard not to get too close. It can't evade forever, though, and the moment it gets too close, Cliff barks out an order. ]


Roller, Fire Punch!

[ The Darmanitan complies with a bellow, drawing back a massive, flame-wreathed fist, and snapping it forward to slam into the approaching Skarmory. The Steel/Flying pokémon is sent skidding across the gym floor. It comes to rest in a smoldering heap at Jasmine's feet and does not rise.

The gym leader sends out her next pokémon, a Magneton. Roller casts a glance at his trainer, who nods. ]
You got it- Flare Blitz.

[ The Darmanitan tenses, fire swirling wildly around it. Roller springs forward in a mad dash, just as a lightning bolt from the Magneton strikes the ground where Roller once was. Roller launches himself into the air, colliding violently with the other pokémon, the Darmanitan's flames encircling them both. They hit the ground a roll a bit, but when the fire dies down, it's Roller who emerges, even if he does look a little beat up. The Magneton remains still, and is quickly recalled into its ball.

That just leaves Jasmine's Steelix, who looms over Roller and trainer. Poor thing. Cliff just smirks. ]


Shall we give 'em the horns, Roller?

[ The Darmanitan makes a noise of agreement, and is already prepping to attack by the time Cliff calmly orders: ] Use Overheat.

[ Roller rears back and unleashes columns of fire from his open maw. They encase the Steelix instantly, and the camera slips in and out of focus for a moment as the Steelix writhes in the bright flame. Despite its best efforts, the heat is too much and the massive pokémon goes down with the resounding sound of clanging metal.

Jasmine retrieves her still-smoking pokémon and offers Cliff the badge with quiet words of congratulations. She's used to seeing that kind of display, but it was at least interesting to see from a pokémon she doesn't encounter often.

Cliffjumper nods his thanks to the Gym Leader, and turns to Roller. The Darmanitan extends a massive fist towards his trainer, which Cliff bumps with his own. ]


Pretty awesome for your first Gym Battle!

[ It's then that he notices Tagalong, and shoots her a Look. ]

Tag, turn that off.

[ One slimy flipper smudges the lens, and then the feed ends. ]
getthehorns: (| this is my Ironhide impression)
[ Hello Johto + Kanto. Meet Roller, who has somehow gotten his hands on Cliff's 'gear. The Darmanitan stares into the camera, fogging up the glass every once and a while as he exhales. ]



[ Charming, isn't he? What a smile.

Thankfully, after a few seconds of letting his pokémon get up close and personal with the network, the camera jostles as Cliff snatches the 'gear away. ]


Gimme that. Are you tryin' to scare people?

[ More jostling, as the camera turns to face Cliff. He's inside of a Pokémon Center, the back of Ironhide's head visible over his shoulder as the elder Autobot deals with the nurse at the counter. ]

Well, I guess this is as good a time as any to share that we're in Olivine now. Hey Rikku, wanna meet us at the Center? We're just about done here, anyway.
getthehorns: (| simmer down now)
[ The video clicks on to the inside of the Goldenrod Department Store. It's clear Cliff doesn't know that his 'Gear has turned on, since the camera is swinging around as he walks.

In the background the most horrid piano-playing ever. Like someone is continuously smashing their head against the keyboard.

The movement stops as an employee grabs Cliff by the arm ]


Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to stop--

I know. I know. I'm going.

[ He picks up his pace for a dizzying few moments, the piano steadily getting louder, until he finally comes to a stop and we are greeted with this sight:

CUT FOR IMAGE )


Yes, it would seem Tagalong, Cliffjumper's Quagsire is responsible for all of the racket. ]


Tag! Knock it off! They're gonna kick us out because you're bein' a nuisance.
getthehorns: (| ... wait a minute)
New badge, new pokémon, new questions.

First of all, does Whitney always pitch a fit when she gets beaten? For a second there I thought I really hurt her feelings- it was fraggin' awkward. Got the badge once I finally got her to turn off the waterworks, though.

Second of all, and this is the big one- what the frag is this?

[ The camera pans down to reveal... this thing!


It could be an egg, except it's too large to be one, and it clearly has eyes, even if they're closed. Cliff nudges it with a foot, and the thing wobbles a bit before falling still again. Rascal the Electrike cautiously sniffs at it, and bats at it with a paw. The thing wobbles, but doesn't fall. Rascal barks, but it doesn't respond.

So the Electrike tackles it, but it still doesn't fall. Just rolls with the impact and rights itself easily, wobbling a bit. ]


Rascal, stop it.

I think it came out of that egg I got, but I'll be damned if I know that it is.

[ He goes to nudge it with his foot again, but suddenly it springs to life!


A pair of arms and legs come out of nowhere, and the pokémon launches itself at Cliff's leg ]


Primus!

[ Cliff drops the 'gear, and the feed ends when it hits the ground. Anyone around Goldenrod will find Cliffjumper with a Darumaka clinging to his leg. ]
getthehorns: (I'm the motherfucking Rock!)
[ VIDEO ]

[ A silver and red and very much made of metal face graces the screen, smirking in a fashion that may be familiar to some. Those who know Cliffjumper will definitely recognize his voice ]

Now this is more like it.

Wanna know what a Cybertronian looks like? This is it. I dunno what's gotten into Johto, but it's good to be back in the metal.

Anybody wanna ride? I got my wheels back, might as well use 'em.


[ ACTION ]

[ There is a big, red amazingly obnoxious car tearing through Johto at rather unsafe speeds. More often than not, he sends wild pokémon scattering with a rev of his engine and a honk of his horn.

He may or may not have come close to hitting a pedestrian or two as well.

In any case, he's got no clear destination in mind. He's just glad to be driving again.

Want a ride? Great. Want to almost get run over? Not so great, but he'll try to stop in time. Running over an organic is not something he ever wants to experience. ]
getthehorns: (| at the end of the world)
[ VIDEO ]

[ Cliff's been busy lately, what with trekking to Goldenrod and watching Ironhide kick everyone's butts the tournament, and he really hasn't been watching the network like he should. But now that things have slowed down, he and Ironhide have settled into Goldenrod, ready to stay there for a while. The video clicks on to show Cliff at the Pokémon Center. He smirks ]

That was a pretty good romp. If there's a tournament next year, sign me up. I'll show you all I'm made of sterner stuff than that.

By the way- Will, I want a rematch one of these--

Excuse me?

[ Cliff turns to face the nurse behind the counter ] Hm?

Are you Mister Cliffjumper?

Yeah, why?

This is for you. I also have one for a Mister Ironhide, but it looks like I can give it to you for him. [ the nurse hands over two pokéballs, and Cliff takes them with a mildly confused expression ]

... Thanks.

[ He wanders away from the counter, whatever message he intended to send completely forgotten. The realeases the two pokémon from their balls and...



He frowns deeply as his 'Dex pings at him. ]


Cordon? Evangeline? What are you guys---

...

Damn it, Charlotte.

[ He suddenly remembers the 'Gear, and the feed ends there ]


[ ACTION ]

[ Cliff can be found just outside of the Center on a bench somewhere, Cordon the Swablu nestled in his lap. He absently strokes the little bird's feathers, looking oddly distant.

Come say hi? ]
getthehorns: (| oh scrap)
[ You are greeted, first of all, with an extreme closeup of a Quagsire. So extreme, in fact, that Tagalong may have left a smudge of slime on the corner of the lens as she turns it around. The camera pans around to reveal an open area, then jars briefly as the camera-Quagsire plops down to a sit.

Once settled, it's easy to make out Cliffumper on one end of the area, his Tauros, Rebel, on the other. ]


You ready for this, Reb? We haven't done this in a while. I don't want you gettin' rusty.

[ The Tauros snorts indignantly, lowering his head. Rusty? He'll show you rusty! ]

Come on, then!

[ Rebel charges, running full-tilt for his trainer. Cliff sets himself, digging his feet in. At the last moment, he catches the Tauros by the horns, Rebel's momentum sending him sliding back a few yards. The Autobot holds his ground, though, and once he comes to a stop, he pushes the pokémon back. Rebel digs his hooves in, pushing back against his trainer.

It's a brutal reverse tug-of-war of sorts. Neither willing to give ground, both trying to force the other into a corner. This goes on for a few moments before Cliff twists, trying to force Rebel into a headlock. The Tauros, is wise to his game, however, and wrenches free of Cliffjumper's grasp. Cliff looks mildly surprised and pleased about this, but Rebel doesn't give his trainer a second. He powers forward, driving his head into his trainer's stomach, effectively winding him.

Another headbutt sends Cliffjumper sprawling back, and he lands unceremoniously on his rear. ]


Oof-! Okay, okay! You're not rusty! I take it back.

[ He casts a glance at his Heracross, who is lounging nearby ] You wanna go a round?

[ Moxie studiously ignores him, and he shrugs. At that moment, a green-and-yellow blur streaks into the clearing and pounces on Cliff- it's his Electrike, tail wagging so fiercely his whole body wiggles. Followed shortly by his Haunter, who piles on top of the Autobot as well. Not long after, Rebel obviously decides, "oh, why not", and flops on Cliffjumper too. ]

What is this? Get me while I'm down, is that it?

[ The 'gear goes clattering to the ground as Tagalong decides she wants to join in on the fun. The bodily throws herself at the pile of pokémon. The last thing we hear from Cliffjumper before the feed ends is a strangled: ]

Help!
getthehorns: (| hello short person!)
[ It's late when the feed clicks on, and Cliff looks more amused than anything. The bob of the camera means he's walking, and the rumble of Ironhide's Onix, Napalm, can be heard nearby. ]

So, we're on our way to Azalea Town- we kinda left Violet in a hurry- but it looks like we picked up a hitchhiker.

[ The camera swings around and comes to focus on a Wooper, perched on the Onix's tail. It's got a big, goofy, Wooper-style grin on its face as it bounces along with the movement of Napalm's tail. ]

It's been followin' us for a couple of days now. I don't know what its deal is, but I think it likes us. Or at least likes the free ride.

[ The camera swings back around to focus on Ironhide, and the front end of the Onix. They're both wearing the same ":|" face. Cliff just chuckles as he turns the camera back to himself. ]

I think its harmless. My traveling partners don't seem to agree.

[ from somewhere off-screen, there is a happy cry of: ] WOOOOPAH! WOOP!
getthehorns: (| who's awesome? I am!)
[ The video clicks on to the interior of the Violet City Gym. It looks like the battle is over, since the video comes to rest on Cliffjumper's Electrike, Rascal, sitting on top of an unconscious Pidgeot. His little tail is wagging so hard his whole body is wiggling. ]

Rascal, let the guy have his pokémon back.

[ Cliff nudges him with a foot, sending him tumbling to the floor, where he rolls onto his back, demanding belly rubs for defeating the big mean birdy. Falkner recalls his Pidgeot, and Cliff heads over to receive his badge. ]

You know a lot about bird pokémon, right? Why are there a gazillion around all of a sudden?

[ Falkner's reply is cut short, as Cliff seems to realize he'd turned his 'Gear on. He promptly turns it off. ]

[ Later, the video clicks back on as he's leaving the Violet Gym, badge in hand. Rascal has taken his customary place draped over one of Cliff's massive shoulders, while his Gastly, Specter, floats along just over his other shoulder. Specter lets out a mournful noise ]

Would you stop? I told you, you can help with the next one. Those birds would've eaten you for breakfast.

Anyway, one down! [ he holds up his newly acquired Zephyr badge with a grin ]
getthehorns: (Default)
[ It's late night when the video kicks on. It's at a bit of an odd angle like it just fell out of someone's bag. Incidentally, it has.

There's Cliffjumper, curled up in his sleeping bag, barely visible by the light of the moon and a dying campfire. He's sleeping, but he's having a rough time with it apparently. Tossing and turning, occasionally muttering something.

Very suddenly, he sits bolt upright with a startled cry. His hand automatically goes to his chest, to cover a wound that isn't there anymore. There's a slight yelp as the Electrike sleeping at his feet is also startled into wakefulness.

Cliff looks confused, shaken, and more than a little annoyed when the Electrike bounds up to lick his face. ]
Rascal, get off.

[ A sigh, and he buries his face in his hands ]

... All Spark.
getthehorns: (| Right. And I'm Starscream.)
[ Cliff fumbles with the 'Gear a bit before it clicks on. You all get treated to a too-close close up of his frowning face ] Fragging human tech. No wonder Ratchet-- oh, there we go.

[ the camera pulls back to a more reasonable distance. Cliff is still frowning, but he looks more confused than angry ]


I got a lot of questions, because one minute there I am pounding faceplate, and the next I've got some human woman calling herself my maker and kicking me out of her house all at once. I also have this--- [ a pair of horns butt their way onto the screen as Cliff's Tauros gives him a light headbutt. Cliff shoves him away ] I was getting to you!

I have this bull thing- a Tauros, right?- and Ironhide's got an... Onix. Bigaft rock monster. What... do we do with them? What do we do in general?

[ There's a bit of a pause, and his expression softens some. ]

... Also, uh. I'm kinda wondering if any of my friends are here. Arcee, Bumblebee, Bulkhead, Ratchet... Optimus. If you're out there, it's me... Cliffjumper. A familiar face would be nice about now.

Not that the old timer isn't great company, but you know.

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Cliffjumper

October 2012

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